Thankfulness

(My sister Cilla and I are pals. February 2009)

I am thankful to be loved. 

I am thankful to love. 

I am thankful to be lovable. (Depending on the day. :-))

Thanksgiving is here, once again. I remember blogging past thanksgivings with lists of things to be thankful for and I could do that again. I could. But as I asked a friend the other day, "is there any real originality left in the world?" ;-)

So I thought I would post the top three things I was incredibly grateful for... and as it turns out, they're all about love. Love begins and ends all things; so do I.

My life has taken some interesting turns the past few months. I am being forced to examine my beliefs, my life, my friends, my relationships... ultimately, myself. What do I want from life? My goals? Where do I feel God is leading me? Yesterday, as I was (finally!) admitting something to myself that I had known for a very long time, I was frightened. It seemed like without that one thing to hold on to, especially right now, I would waver and fall. But I realized that I was being forced to turn to God alone for comfort and courage and strength. This is where I should have been all along.

I am thankful for realizations like these. I am thankful for being buffeted by the winds of life and grasping at the only thing I can. He is my rock and fortress, my comfort in time of trouble. He loves me.

What has been happening in my life lately?

Teaching. This you know. But you know not how wonderful it has been! I have ten students and I feel like I'm  seeing progress in almost all of them. Not just in piano playing but confidence in themselves and our relationship as a teacher/student/friend. It is so exciting watching them realize something about music. :-) The more I teach, the more passionate I am. These are the moments I cannot wait for the future to teach me how to be the best piano teacher in the world. ;-)

Michele's kids made it home for Thanksgiving and we have been having a blast. :-) Firstly, we played this amazing game: The Settlers of Catan. Before which I was warned to not mind being annihilated because that was most likely going to be my fate. However, these people took pity on me and between all their brains, I managed to come in third. I think. It's a very complicated game but I liked it...

Yesterday evening, we volunteered at The Happy Nun. Michele and Brie waitressed tables; Gillian and I washed dishes; Aaron and Will did bar/sound/buffing glasses. This restaurant is the most amazing place in the entire world. I kid you not. Owned and run by Don and Shannon  Shakotko, who are friends and amazing people all around. :-) If you're ever in Forget, you simply must check them out. Anyways, we were there until midnight and I didn't get into bed until around 2 am this morning.

Well, I would write more but voice in the kitchen indicate that everyone has shown their face but me. :-) So I will prepare myself for visuals (you probably wouldn't want to lay eyes on me about now... let's just say my appearance indicates a good sleep ;-)). Lol.

Two practices at the theater today as well as my third celebration of the Canadian Thanksgiving. :-) Life is busy as well as good! Thanks for the thoughts and prayers.

P.S. http://www.happynuncafe.ca/ :-)

"...I believe in pink.
I believe that laughing is the best
                                  calorie-burner.
I believe in staying strong when
     everything seems to be going wrong.
I believe that the happiest girls
                     are the prettiest girls.
I believe that tomorrow is another day,
  & most importantly,
           I believe in miracles." 
                     Audrey Hepburn

Love Check: All Apply Here

All you need in the world is love and laughter. That's all anybody needs. To have love in one hand and laughter in the other. 

August Wilson 

I laugh. A lot. Mostly at people.

This morning I laughed, in two separate instances, at two friends, right in their faces. What was so funny that I had to burst into uncontrollable giggles?

I felt rather guilty afterwards but then, I realized something. Do you know what the most wonderful feeling in the world is? When I laugh at myself and realize that God is laughing with me. When God laughs, I know it's because He loves me. It is the same reason I laugh at those closest to me... Love.

So the moral of this blog post is this: If I don't laugh at you, I don't love you. ;-)

"Weeping may endure for a night, but joy cometh in the morning" (Psalm 30:5).

I believe that laughter is a language of God and that we can all live happily ever laughter. 

Yakov Smirnoff 

Galileo

"I do not feel obliged to believe that the same God who has endowed us with sense, reason, and intellect has intended us to forgo their use."                          Galileo Galilei (1564-1642)

I just finished watching the movie Angels and Demons. Over the course of the film, they mentioned Galileo several times and it has brought back to me some of what I have read about this man. I need to read more before I have an opinion about him and his work... but at this moment, I felt a need to express my gratitude for all who have stood up to the majority for the sake of truth. They have changed the course of history but most importantly, shown others the path of life. May there be giants in every age.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Galileo_Galilei

The Healer of Hearts

Sister Lucille asked me to play for the service they are conducting at the home today.. of course I said yes. :-) But half of the songs I really didn't know so I was practicing this morning. There are some really nice melodies and the words are always great... I was singing along and suddenly, the second verse of this song really grabbed my attention... the wording is interesting.

God broke my heart, but He healed me. Bitterness and hate do not feel comfortable in it any longer. My new heart is for "love alone".

Here I Am, Lord

(Dan Schutte)

I, the Lord of sea and sky,

I have heard my people cry.

All who dwell in dark and sin

My hand will save.

I who made the stars of night,

I will make their darkness bright.

Who will bear My light to them?

Whom shall I send?

I, the Lord of snow and rain, 

I have borne My people's pain.

I have wept for love of them.

They turn away.

I will break their hearts of stone,

give them hearts for love alone. 

I will speak My word to them.

Whom shall I send?

I, the Lord of wind and flame, 

I will tend the poor and lame.

I will set a feast for them.

My hand will save.

Finest bread I will provide

Till their hearts are satisfied.

I will give My life to them.

Whom shall I send?

(Chorus)

Here I am, Lord,

Is it I, Lord?

I have heard You calling in the night.

I will go Lord,

If You lead me.

I will hold Your people in my heart. 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PBWtDtaBvAk

Naomi Dolls Up... among other subjects

Michele and I were talking...

Wait a minute. Did I...? Yes. I did. My last post began in a similar fashion. ;-) Have you begun to suspect that we talk a lot? :-)

Well, the lady has been a teacher for many years... and a good one. After listening and watching me teach one of my students, she gave me some advice that I am intending to follow to the best of my ability:

1: Dress up. Don't stay in my bunny hug and paint bespattered skirt, even if they are comfy and warm. (There *is* a heater in my studio which I can use...)

2: Make a solid lesson plan to follow for the half hour.

3: Get the student on the piano bench and playing. Less 'chit-chat the better'.

4: A grown-up spending a half hour of solid one on one time with a child will never be forgotten. "People almost always remember who their piano teacher was" for that reason.

5: Reward practice time; reward children for every fifteen minutes they practice, etc. (I'm still not sure what to do for my older students...)

6: Make my studio professional looking. Customize it. Make a special place for me and my student.

Not one of my students but a friend from camp. The one. The only. THOMAS!!!

One other thing I would love to do but I'm not sure how this is going to work out, is to get all of my students together and create a performance they can all do together. Each person has their own special part in it. But we shall see. For now, my heart is beating a little strangely over all I must accomplish this morning... and still have energy for this afternoon. ;-)

7: Pray for my students individually and ask for wisdom regarding how to teach them.

Cheers, my dears. May your day today be as enjoyable as mine...

No Hermits Allowed

It is important to dream. It is important to have goals. 

Yes, two very blunt statements. What brought that on, you ask. And furthermore, what do goals and dreams have with the banishment of hermits? In time.. in time. Patience. Horses should be held in until 3/4 of the way through the post. ;-) (If you have no idea of what that last statement means, ask my sister Lydia.)

I was talking to Michele and my friend Jesse and they made me realize some things about myself. The first thing that I found out was that I have always been afraid to dream for fear of not being strong enough to realize it. Or maybe it was because I wondered if my dreams were from the selfishness in my heart. 

That realization brought me to another,  my lack of faith. God places desires into our hearts. He does not place them there to make us miserable.

For instance, one of my dreams is to get married to a wonderful man and have children someday. God gave me this desire so...

What can I do to prepare myself for this time? 

1: I can learn to be content with my single status until the time comes for it to change. To be joyful in the now... this moment, not waiting for tomorrow or next year. 

2: I can learn how to become efficient with money. How to become thrifty and wise in the spending of funds. (Note: *not* a miser. Just thrifty. ;-))

3: Behave in a way to all that will glorify God and make my future husband appreciate that I'm saving myself for him. And, show my children what a true lady acts like. 

4: Become closer to God so I can teach my children about Him and be the mother I should be. 

5: Learn how to support myself (both from the home and otherwise) so I am not completely dependent on the man I marry. (Note: Unless God worked a miracle in my heart, I would not marry a man who could/would not support me.)

6: Through this all, realizing that if God wants me to wait many years or just months, I can trust that He doeth all things well. 

Some days, I am completely overwhelmed with these six things. Honestly. So I step back and close my eyes to all of them except the first one. My relationship with God takes first place over anything else. Resting in Him and learning from Him is like getting my battery recharged.  

I certainly don't have it all figured out. I'm still in the deciphering stage. Lol. But things are coming clearer and I am feeling more fulfilled and at peace. I am happy. I am no longer a hermit in a crowd waiting for life to catch up to me. (Well, maybe just a little bit of a hermit. It's kind of a fun status to hold. ;-) j/k) My newly created goals have brought me out of my shell and given me new purpose.

What are some of your goals? You don't have to answer that question out loud. But ask yourself. Especially you girls. What do you feel God wants for you? Are you preparing for it? Don't fall into the lie that girls are good for nothing but marriage and kids. Maybe God wants you to serve somewhere else. Remember Ruth and Priscilla... read Proverbs 31 again with open eyes. Deborah is almost painfully awesome for me. None of them simply sat at home and waited for life to come find them. No, some of them went and found it while others kept busy until it did find them. But none of them were unproductive.

And guys... yes, I mean you and you and you. :-) What are you doing to grow up? We need you to be men. What does God want from your life?

There is no need for us to be adrift. It isn't necessary. It isn't biblical. We need to have dreams. We need to have goals. 

Some of my other goals:

Driver's licence.

Being the best piano teacher.

Being the best pianist that my abilities will allow.

The best, most loyal, supportive friend to all my friends.

Being someone people can trust.

Keeping my eyes on God and drawing closer to Him.

Write a book. Or two. 

Compose music.

Always being involved in theater.

Being responsible in every aspect of my life.

Making time for all the children who cross my path.

I would love to read about your goals and how you are preparing... if you would like to share. :-) I am all ears!! 

Looking Back...

 ...when ads were works of art

I appreciate her hair. 

The cat...

P.S. She has a ring on her finger; possibly the wrong hand... ;-) 
Regardless, hubbys *do* bring their wives chocolate.

A Little Nonsense

They say when you have nothing to say, you shouldn't say it. But I'm going to anyhow. ;-)

1: I am enjoying being lazy today.

2: I am also enjoying Natural Bakery Canadian Rye Bread. I think it's the best bread ever. Soooo delicious.

3: Michele whisked the rest of my cookies out of the house this afternoon to give to people. It's a good thing too because I had cravings for chocolate this morning and to be alone in the house with *it* sitting on the counter is not wise.

4: This morning, I found out what I needed to begin the process for acquiring my driver's license.

5: I spelled "acquired" correctly first try. So happy. :-)

6: I watched 3 Hayao Miyazaki films this afternoon: My Neighbor Totoro, Kiki's Delivery Service and Porco Rosso. Courtesy of my friend Jesse. So thankful to have had a chance to encounter these tales and learn from them. For those of you who are interested in the details of story making, watch this man's films. These are great stories.

7: I should go eat supper.

8: I had a blueberry smoothie with my ham sandwich at dinner. It settled wonderfully.

9: I feel good right now.

10: I am anxious to get completely better so I can dig into the Nutella in the cupboard. ;-)

11: I am fulfilled at this moment. There is Someone who can satisfy all your longings and overflow your heart with joy.

12: I love making lists... especially ones that are partly serious and partly nonsensical!

Pray for me? :-)

I'm coughing more today. I don't feel bad... kinda tired but not any sicker. I'm just wondering when it's going to end. Please pray that I'll be able to kick this *soon*. :-) But please pray more that I'll be a joy and comfort to those I am around. I am not worried really but I know how easily my focus is shifted from God and those in my life to me, me, me. :-P And I definitely need to be thinking about God right now. :-) :-)

Thanks. :-)

I posted this verse on my FB yesterday:

He hath made every thing beautiful in his time: also he hath set the world in their heart, so that no man can find out the work that God maketh from the beginning to the end. Ecclesiastes 3:11

Theater... my new role

Director: All right! Now -- I need one of you to take the Colonel's place."

Others: That shouldn't be hard. What does he have to do? Absolutely nothing!

Woman [Me]: I'm good at that!

How is they peg me every time?! Lol. ;-) Oh! You say. That's not true. You do a lot. You keep busy and accomplish much! But have you any idea of the secret desires of my heart?

To sit outside in the sunshine with that special someone (I don't even know his name yet...), a good book and fine chocolate.

So you see, it may have been a lucky guess to assign me that role but... ;-) Hehe.

I love theater.

Love Is Home -- George MacDonald

LOVE IS HOME.   

 Love is the part, and love is the whole;     Love is the robe, and love is the pall;   Ruler of heart and brain and soul,     Love is the lord and the slave of all!   I thank thee, Love, that thou lovest me;   I thank thee more that I love thee.    Love is the rain, and love is the air;     Love is the earth that holdeth fast;   Love is the root that is buried there,     Love is the open flower at last!   I thank thee, Love all round about,   That the eyes of my love are looking out.    Love is the sun, and love is the sea;     Love is the tide that comes and goes;   Flowing and flowing it comes to me;     Ebbing and ebbing to thee it flows!   Oh my sun, and my wind, and tide!   My sea, and my shore, and all beside!    Light, oh light that art by showing;     Wind, oh wind that liv'st by motion;   Thought, oh thought that art by knowing;     Will, that art born in self-devotion!   Love is you, though not all of you know it;   Ye are not love, yet ye always show it!    Faithful creator, heart-longed-for father,     Home of our heart-infolded brother,   Home to thee all thy glories gather—     All are thy love, and there is no other!   O Love-at-rest; we loves that roam—   Home unto thee, we are coming home!

--George MacDonald

Energy! :bounce: :bounce: :bounce:

Thank you to all who prayed for me. I had a really good day today. And it wasn't just good in the sense that I am feeling much better today than I have in a long time (yay!!) but God has brought some understanding to me about certain things in my life. Even though this or that may be less than comfortable, and maybe even a little embarrassing, it's ok. He will make all things beautiful in His time. Right now, I need to sit back and enjoy the ride. :-) I need to trust in the Driver. :-)

This morning I...

Got up.

Tidied room.

Practiced piano.

Prayed.

Prepared for teaching tomorrow.

Turned computer on.

Ate lunch.

Asked if I should make cookies. (Positive.)

Answered phone.

Walked to Main Street.

Mailed parcel.

Got cookie making ingredients.

Got Vitamin D.

Got candy for my kids.

Came home.

Watched movie.

Made soup (which is a story all in it's own... someday I shall tell you).

Made cookies.

Ate supper.

Helped with kitchen clean-up.

And am sitting before you now, with some energy left. I can hardly believe it. :-) I feel *so good*. Thank you, Lord! :-)

Btw, I bought some liquid Vitamin D3 today. Has anyone ever used something like it before and what is your opinion of it?

Letter Writing -- Keep It Alive

The other day, I made myself sit down and hand write a note to a friend. When I was done, I sat back, smiled contentedly at my creation and wondered why it was such a struggle to sit down in the first place?

I love writing letters.

I love making words beautiful and snappy and readable. I love watching my personality unfold as line after line flows from my pen onto the paper. I love dashing off a sixteen page letter to my best friend about the things I'm struggling with... and crumpling it all up for the fire (most of the time, that is ;-)). And when I am so happy that I want to dance, well, all of those get sent. ;-)

But the past few months haven't been for letter writing. Most of the time I was out-of-this-world busy. The times I wasn't, I simply wanted to sit and veg.

I didn't realize how much I had missed it until yesterday, when I grabbed my letter writing makings and sat out on the deck in the evening sunlight. My friend had a baby earlier this year (her 5th) and sent me a birth announcement... which I was replying to. (Just a few months late!) I remember getting similar letters from her when each of her children were born... and some very sad letters when her son William went to be with Jesus. Further years back, I still have the letter she wrote to inform me of her engagement to her now husband... and somewhere in my stashed away belongings, her letters as a 17 yr. old girl, writing to an 8 yr. old me. 16 years of scribbled cards and paper and pictures. I could show you on one hand the times we've met during these years... but, believe me, the letters are slightly more numerous. She has been so faithful in her letter writing and her friendship to me.

When I am feeling a little lost and I'm counting the things that never change, she is listed among them.

Letter writing is in my blood because my Mama has always written letters. Even when she was really busy with all of us kids, I can see her sitting at the table, writing to her Grandpa and Grandma. (Btw, just so you know the type of woman my Mom is, once when her Grandma sent her a check for her birthday, she insisted that Mom spend it on herself and she also wanted feedback as to what Mom purchased. Lol!) So for me to have a big box of stationary and cards and my favorite pens is perfectly normal.

But the more I am around people, the more I realize how many people can't even sign their own names legibly. And letter writing? Let's not even go there. I'm not criticizing them. The age of computers and email and Facebook and Blogs are upon us. If I did not have a history of letter writing, would I? It's so easy to type on my laptop and connect with people over Facebook.

I love Facebook! I love my blogs. I love Gmail. :-) And I especially love Google. Hehe.

But they can never replace a letter in the mailbox. My Facebook notifier will never give me the thrill of slitting open an envelope and pulling out a hand written missive. Twelve emails in my Inbox will never embrace my senses with the sender's subtle scent. And while special emails may get Archived, they'll never end up in my special letter box.

How many people in the past few years have had the joy of opening their mail box and finding a big, fat, juicy letter addressed to them?

Here is a challenge: Once a week, write a note (it doesn't have to be a letter!) to someone. Ask how they're doing. What the weather has been like. What has been happening in your life. Something funny that happened to you in the past year. Remind them of an old memory you have together. Envelop them with your special scrawl and scent and thoughts.

Keep this art alive.

P.S. I'm going to try to keep my own challenge. ;-)

God's Compassion

I've had some really good days this past week. I was feeling so much better and so fulfilled in my duties that I was full of joy. They were such good days. :-)

Yesterday, I walked to main street to mail some stuff to my sisters and get some necessities. I felt ok until I got back into the house and started coughing. I literally thought my lungs were coming up too. Lol. And I couldn't do anything to stop it. I just had to sit and let it pass. In that time, all my fears were flung back into my face and I had to do some thinking.

How easy it is to trust in God's will when I'm feeling great and life is beautiful.

Just as God has a purpose for granting us those times full of light and joy, so He has a purpose in the times I fear and doubt. I trust in Him to be all I will need, this moment. This moment is forever. I know, I've said it a million times before, but I needed this today. :-)

But though he cause grief, yet will he have compassion according to the multitude of his mercies. For he doth not afflict willingly nor grieve the children of men... (Lamentations 3)

I can be happy today. Or I could huddle in my chair and listen to my fears. I could trust today. Or I could ask God 'Why?'. I could be a light today. Or I could hide away and let someone else do the shining. But when I'm looking into His face, how can I fear with such compassion and love shining down on me?

What a friend we have in Jesus,

All our sins and griefs to bear!

What a privilege to carry

Everything to God in prayer!

Oh, what peace we often forfeit,

Oh, what needless pain we bear,

All because we do not carry

Everything to God in prayer!

I will be happy today. :-)